Miley Cyrus: "My Vagina Now More Popular than Jesus"

After blowing the top off the entertainment world by exposing her bottom a la Britney Spears, Miley Cyrus has come up with another stunner to draw media attention to herself a la John Lennon: She claims her vagina is now more popular than Jesus.

In a recent press conference in which Cyrus touted her new CD entitled "Can't Be Tamed," Cyrus was asked about the mounting popularity of her underage underworld, recently flashed around the internet after she allegedly exited a vehicle in front of the cameras while not wearing panties. "Well, my vagina is more popular than Jesus now, I don't know which will go first, my cooter or Christianity." The statement caused an immediate stir in the cadre of male reporters ringing the young star with their tongues hanging out, and is guaranteed to raise a few eyebrows around the world.

Indeed, her vagina has taken on a life of its own and threatens to run roughshod over the careers of Lady Gaga and Katy Perry as Cyrus competes with naked pictures of everyday women dispensed for free on the internet..

To capitalize on the rising star trajectory coming from her vaginal release, and the fact her bottom half is now more popular than her top half ever was, her manager has come up with a novel act: To have Miley perform during the rest of her "Can't be Tamed" tour standing on her head and lip synching from her famous vagina.

In the old days a similar dance move was called a "blow-off" and in a nod to the by-gone era of stripping at the traveling carnival, Cyrus smokes a cigarette through her poon and blows the smoke out of her ass during the encore. This part of her act alone is accredited for the reversal in slumping ticket sales as her core fans, girls 10 to 12 years old, have ditched her and her newfound skanky in droves. "Well, it sure beats the hell out of looking at an oil spill all summer," said one 46 year old male audience member.

Update: Tawdry Soup has learned Cyrus's next publicity stunt involves shaving her head and trying to kill a car with an umbrella. Stay tuned for details.
Story courtesy of thespoof.com

Perez Hilton May Be In Hot Water Over Nude Miley Cyrus

Perez Hilton might be in some hot water after posting an uncensored photo of Miley Cyrus' private parts to his Twitter account.

Early Monday morning, Hilton posted a picture of the 17-year-old pop star wearing a short white dress and no underwear. In the photo, Cyrus is in the midst of climbing out of an open-topped convertible car with her lady parts exposed.

For his two million plus followers to see, the celebrity blogger posted the picture with the following introduction, "If you are easily offended, do NOT click here. Oh, Miley! Warning: truly not for the easily offended!"

But it's the celebrity blogger that might need a warning. Cyrus is underage. Police might consider her naked image child pornography.

Recently, Cryus has been facing a barrage of criticism for being too sexy due to skimpy concert outfits and her edgy single, "Can't Be Tamed"

It is unclear if Hilton will face any legal trouble, but he might be setting himself up for yet another celebrity feud.

Story courtesy of CBS

Miley Cyrus Denies Kissing A Girl

Guess she didn't like it...

Miley Cyrus says she didn't kiss another girl during her performance on Britain's Got Talent recently. Says Miley:

"I performed ‘Can't Be Tamed' this week on one of my favorite shows here in the UK Britian's Got Talent. Which is totally true, there were some amazinnnggg acts (but of course no one could focus on that.) I had such a blast and was so honored to be on that stage. That being said during my performance I supposedly ‘KISSED A GIRL' and this is the newest thing to cause controversy.

I promise you I did not kiss her and it is ridiculous that two entertainers cant even rock out with each other without the media making it some type of story. I really hope my fans are not disappointed in me because the truth is I did nothing wrong. I got up there and did my job which is to perform to the best of my ability. I just want to put an end to this right now and just say one thing to everyone out there making this performance such a big deal.

GET OVER IT! NOTHING HAPPENED. THERE ARE WAYYYYYYY MORE IMPORTANT THINGS IN THE WORLD. Let's start focusing a little less on making up ignorant rumors and focus a little more on world peace! We gotta a lot of work to do if we wan this earth to be here much longer. Let's make a change! It wouldn't hurt the world to show a little more love. X M"

Story courtesy of 411mania.com

Miley Cyrus' Toxic Jewelry

Wal-Mart stores have removed Miley Cryus' jewelry line after finding out that they contain a toxic I'm slipping under metal that may cause cancer if ingested.

Here's the statement they released:

“In the absence of any U.S. cadmium standard, we voluntarily adopted the British Standard Safety of Toys — Part 3, the only standard in the world for cadmium in children’s products, and applied it to children’s jewelry. Wal-Mart was an industry leader in adopting this standard and applying it to children’s jewelry and several other product lines. We shared this new Wal-Mart standard for children’s jewelry with our suppliers, and mandate that they adhere to it and they must conduct tests to verify that they do. Children’s jewelry products manufactured after April 9, 2010 must meet this Wal-Mart standard to be sold in our stores. We also reviewed children’s jewelry manufactured before April 9 and found that most conformed to our new Wal-Mart standard. We voluntarily withdrew the few products that did not. As we have always done, if customers raise new concerns, we evaluate the products involved and take appropriate action.

The Miley Cyrus and Max Azria line is not for children. It is sold in our ladies apparel section and it was designed for and marketed to older audiences. However, it is possible that a few younger consumers may seek it out in stores. Miley Cyrus and Max Azria jewelry is not intended for children, but as part of our unwavering commitment to protecting the safety of children, we are removing all of the jewelry from sale while we investigate its compliance with our children’s jewelry standard.

Miley Cyrus, Max Azria and Wal-Mart stand together in the belief that the safety of our customers is absolutely a top priority.”

Miley - I know you probably just endorse anything without a thought, but you might want to look into things a little deeper before putting your name on them. Now I know you're just a beauty high school dropout with no desire to go to college, but you should have your agents and lawyers read those big words to you and explain what they mean.

Ashton Kutcher is...Twat Of The Day

Ashton Kutcher thinks it's OK for a 16 year old to perform oral lap dances and act all slutty and in his latest twats, defends Skanky Cyrus.

"Ur comments on Miley are completely unwarranted. She's 17... Judgment is unbecoming. I think it's important to think about the context of the event she was at. It's not like she was at a club with some stranger."

Reality check Kutcher. She was 16 at the time - giving a lap dance to a co-worker, in front of other co-workers! And tell me Ashton - how many other jobs do you think would tolerate this whore-ish behavior at a workplace from a teenager??  Real classy. Twat.


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Boyfriend Defends Miley's Good Head

Liam Hemsworth, Skanky Cyrus' current fuck-stick, says he has no issues with his slutty girlfriend's video.

"Everyone gets criticism, it's kind of what comes with this job … everybody's trying to bring you down. She's gives got a good head on her shoulders."

He also commented on their relationship. "We get along great, she gives good head , she's a great girl. We have work great sex together."

Miley Challenges Any Stripper To A Lap Dance Off

Who says Miley Cyrus isn't just a simple girl with a dream. Here she is doing what every 16 year old does - practicing to be a whore her stripper grind with a much older man.

At the wrap party for the movie "The Last Song", Skanky Cyrus thought she would dry hump director Adam Shankman on stage and from the looks of it, I would say it was to completion.

Who says innocence is dead.

Miley Cyrus Taking A Huge Risk With Justin Bieber

What is Miley Cyrus thinking? Didn't she read about the death threats Kim Kardashian received after tweeting about being Justin Bieber's girlfriend? Besides he's not her type...he's almost her age.

The two were seen having dinner together at "Ari-Ya", a restaurant in West Hollywood, on Monday and claim it was to discuss a "side project".  I have to believe this because trampy Cyrus doesn't date anyone under 20.  The skank likes a full grown monty, not a still developing one.

Miley Cyrus Is A Dodo

Miley Cyrus is definitely going the Britney Spears route.   A teen star looking slutty before her time.  The 17 year old Cyrus works hard to look seductive on the cover of her new CD "Can't Be Tamed", but I all I see is more of a constipated look.  It's like she's grunting one out.


She talked to MTV about the video for the title track. "I think it definitely shows a change of what people remember me as, but it's not trying to not be me." Huh? What Change?  Everyone already thinks you're a little tramp, so not much changing there.

"I didn't want to be just a character. I wanted to be myself and just in a bird-like form in the way I dressed."  She is herself.  She is one big dodo. 

I also like how they guy in the video introduces her as "the rarest creature on Earth, Avis Cyrus."  Last time I checked, sluts weren't all that rare.  In face, they're pretty common.

Miley Cyrus Refuses To Think

Miley Cyrus refuses to think about the future.  My guess is she doesn't like to think whatsoever.

The Disney star admits "I don't really look too far into the future and it drives people nuts. I don't even like a feeling that I have to be somewhere at a certain time. That would mean I'm responsible. I do that enough with my job so when it's my free time screw everyone, I get my freak on don't know what's going to happen or who I'm going to sleep hang out with. Tomorrow will come and I'll figure it out then."

Those are words to live by Miley.  Just lay caution to the wind and worry about the repercussions afterward. Sounds a lot like Lindsay Lohan's philosophy.